is it fall yet?

Is it fall yet? no? one more day you say?!

i'm realizing more and more, that as i get older, my disdain for the summer months goes up. i don't even have kids in school yet!

i remember the years when i used to look forward to the summer; when the summer was a thing to be treasured! those were the days of spending weeks at a time at bear lake with my friends, laying on the beach without the worry of premature aging, just worrying about looking good for that weekends dance  at the old farm. raspberry shakes without the worry of the extra poundage.

when it came time for early dance practices, that wasn't a problem either! sure, it sucked to get up but there was always the promise of a bed to come home to an nap in for the next three hours following a practice. by the time i would wake up, it would be just in time to get ready for the evening festivities with friends: night games, hot tub, swinging under the tree.

now, all of that fun and nostalgia has given way to just stress and tiredness in the summer! summer now means chasing kids to slather on sunscreen they hate, putting on a happy face as you take them to a HOT HOT park, and oh my gosh, swimming.... when did swimming become such a hassle! i feel like i am in perma panic mode whenever we make it to a pool! i wish i had reptilian eyes, you know, the one that can look in two directions at once? yeah, those ones. it doesn't help at all that i have two children who are fearless in the water and are all over the place and demand independence! i can't tell you how many times i've had that "moment" of panic. you know, the moment when you are frantically searching for your child who was JUST right there and now has disappeared. when your blood goes cold and you know that a rapist MUST have grabbed them from the fence and you will never see them again. one thing that scared the shiza out of me is the low low fences here! 3-5 feet tall is all! a kidnappers dream! if my kids weren't so damn cute and not afraid of strangers, maybe i wouldn't be such a crazy ass.

standard low fence

no pool fear

so, you guys see all of these pictures of the fun little outings we go on. fun for the boys? yes! that's why i do it! fun for me? N to the O! As my parents found out when they were here last weekend, even with 5 of us watching them, one always manages to slip away. i was all cool with taking them to the ball park to watch jeremy play every friday, until my dad mentioned that he thought that was the best place to kidnap a kid because there is so much going on! really dad?! i need another place to fear?

oh and forget about that thing they call "energy" cause i aint got it. i hope that when all of this early child rearing phase is over, i will have enough pictures of happy faces that i will forget how tired i always was and just remember how happy i was able to make them. i hope that i will even be able to convince myself that i didn't have that hard of a time. i will only be reminded of it again when my daughter is at the same stage in life. only then will years of memories flood back to me so i can tell her that she is not alone, much like my momma has done for me.


back to the fall and why it's SOOO much better than the summer. for one, boys clothes are way better looking! sweaters. hats. layers. long sleeves. they all make for a handsome and dapper little man. i'm sure my neighbors are way stoked about the fall so they wont have to see my kids in their underwear/diapers so much. yeah, i've become that mom. my reasoning: with all of the stains they are prone to, it is much easier to keep them partially clothed until we are just about to go somewhere. seriously, these boys are stain MAGNETS!

1/2 naked when possible

cute fall clothes!!

the other major plus is the many activities that involve being in enclosed spaces. it's now kosher to take the kids to indoor play places, like monkey business where we went yesterday. it was fully enclosed, had NO back entrances, and there was SO much for them to do! they even had an art room full of paints, paper, easels, and drying racks. i also would like to take the boys on a train ride (enclosed space)  and drive through the mountains/picnic.

ah, they WANT to be in the stroller

can't wait for getting pumpkins at a patch! for this, as in the past, there is a goal in mind and so seth has been able to not run off. we are there to find the perfect pumpkin and to get it, he NEEDS me there by him to pick it up for him. that is they key.

also waiting to get some extra use out of the backyard fire pit. this activity is a little stress inducing (open flame, curious kids, running) but again, if there is a goal, like roasting a marsh mallow, their energy can be directed in a safe way.

was i always this nervous and crazy? no, no i wasn't. i think i've always been on the cautious side, but this pregnancy has definitely brought out the neurotic side. heck, i even check to make sure the basement windows are locked before i go to bed for cry in out loud! with all of this craziness though, i am probably the furthest thing from a helicopter mom. riddle me that. if you see me at the park or somewhere else, i always seem super duper calm, but trust me, there is a frantic woman inside screaming for control!

so, let's celebrate the coming change of season and a change of pace. a slowing down of things. cute clothes. party planning. getting the house decorated. crafts for the kids. baking. ahhhhh. sounds so nice!